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Articles by Jan |
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Articles by Jan Browse through these articles by Jan—you'll pick up some tips and get a sense of her philosophy. Please use any of these articles in your newsletter or professional journal. Just be sure to show Jan as the author and include this acknowledgment at the end of the article: Jan M. McLaughlin is an expert in spoken, written and visual communication who leads workshops and offers keynote speeches. You can contact her at 206.328.0080 or Jan@YourCommunicationConnection.com. Don't Just Talk,
Communicate Have you ever been in a big hurry and started talking before you thought about what you wanted to say? I remember when I was teaching ninth grade English. One morning I overslept. Awaking with a start, I called the principal and asked someone to cover my first period class and I'd be right there. I raced to school, rushed into the room to find thirty ninth graders quietly seated at their desks with their hands folded. Now this is enough to disconcert anyone! I immediately started rattling on about what we were to do that day. Finally, a student raised his hand and said, "Ms. McLaughlin, you haven't made any sense since you walked into the room. And besides that, you have a sleep scar running all the way down your face!" Clearly I hadn't thought through what I wanted to say. I bet you've done that too—we all have! Think of a recent conversation you had with someone that didn't turn out the way you would have liked—with a customer, client, coworker, friend or family member. With your situation in mind, explore with me the four essential factors in communication—our intent, criteria, content and process.
First we need to make sure we know our intent Our intent is our purpose—what we want to accomplish in the exchange. So often a conversation is like a pinball machine—we pull a lever and that little steel ball just ricochets off this peg and that. A good conversation is more like archery. We must take careful aim if we want to hit the mark. I was reminded of this on a walk with my friend Roger. I'd had an unpleasant experience and wanted to bounce it off him. I'll never forget what he said that day, "Do you want empathy or a solution?" What a great question—to be asked and to ask ourselves. What's your intent in the conversation?
It's important to share our criteria The second essential factor in communication is our criteria. These are the relevant factors to be taken into consideration. Each of us can bring very different criteria to the same situation. Some of us want things right now, others want things to be perfect, while still others want to avoid conflict. It's important that we share our criteria with the person we're talking to. My friend's young daughter was very clear about her criteria and intent when she said to me, "Jan, you can make my Mom do anything. Will you tell her we want a puppy?"
Content is the third essential factor in communication The content is what we end up talking about. If we haven't made our intent clear and haven't shared our criteria, the content can become the battleground. Say you need to discuss with a coworker the impact it has on your team when they're late—which they frequently are. If we start the conversation with the sarcastic question, "So, is your alarm clock broken?" they are immediately placed on the defensive and will likely come back with an equally sarcastic retort. And, there are two words that signal the discussion we're having is about to deteriorate into an argument. We call them absolutes—always and never. "You're always late." "Am not." "Are too." "Am not." "Are too." Conversation over and nothing accomplished.
How we look, how we sound and the words we say The last essential factor in communication is the process—how we communicate. Albert Mehrabian in his book, Silent Messages, determined that if our message is incongruent, people will depend on what they see—our facial expressions and body language—for 55% of the message they receive. They will depend on what they hear—the tone, volume, pace and pitch of our voice—for 38% of the message they receive. Our words comprise a mere 7% of the message people receive IF our communication is incongruent. We want to make sure our voice and body language agree with the words that we way. We need to strive for congruent communication. When we are careful to share our intent and criteria with others, when we think through our content and process, we are much more likely to get the results we want. If you speak before you think, you run the risk of rushing into a room and rattling on and on while everyone is staring at the sleep scar on your face!
Keep Your Customers and Clients Coming Back While researching his book, The Customer Driven Company, Richard Whitely surveyed fourteen corporations and found that 70% of the identifiable reasons customers stopped doing business with a company had to do with service lapses such as a lack of personal attention or unhelpful employees. Another survey revealed that the average American business loses 15% of its customer base each year: 68% of these customer leave because of an attitude of indifference from a company employee. That is, the customer's perception of the employee's attitude. Karl Albrecht, coauthor of Service America, says, "Customer satisfaction relates to attitude. Service is about feelings. However your employees feel is how your customers are going to feel, sooner or later." Training needs to focus on helping customer-contact employees develop an awareness of how others might perceive them. Simply becoming aware of the impression we make on others can be the motivation to change. Whether you're a supervisor, department manager, training director or human resources director, here are seven steps you can take to lead customer-contact employees toward a service image that places satisfied customers at its heart.
Focus on preferred perceptions Start by asking, "How do you want customers to perceive the people who work in our company?" In my workshops, we develop a list of words that describe how we want to be perceived—caring, flexible, reliable, concerned, honest, having a sense of humor. The list goes on. This is a good exercise for a staff meeting—getting everyone focused on an appropriate service image. Then, stress that these qualities are communicated through our implicit—or nonverbal—behavior. In his book, Silent Messages, Albert Mehrabian cited results of his experiments which revealed that "…people's implicit behavior has more bearing than their words on communicating feelings or attitudes to others."
Communicate expectations We can't assume that an employee will know how we want something done. Common sense is far from common! It's important that you teach employees the behavior you want from them. It's not enough, for instance, to say, "I want people to have the distinct impression that you were glad to be of help after they've talked to you."
Be specific It's quite easy to be very specific about implicit behavior—facial expressions, body language, quality of voice. Consider your phone policy. Take time at a staff meeting to role-play how to deal with customers on the phone. Teach employees to always get a caller's name, write it down and use it in conversation—especially in closing. In his book, Monitoring, Measuring, & Managing Customer Service, Gary Goodman explains what he refers to as the call path. This involves a script for the opening and closing phrases you want your customer service staff to use. He cites a great deal of research to support his suggestions. Be sure to have your staff practice the proper pitch variety to their voice as they deliver this script. You may find that an employee talks too fast or doesn't enunciate clearly. Elicit their cooperation—and permission—to place a tape recorder near their telephone. Listen to the recording together and evaluate specific aspects of the quality of their voice. For further work, you might get the tape album, The Sound of Your Voice, by speech pathologist, Dr. Carol Fleming. People need, in the words of Robert Waterman, "directed autonomy." They need both specific direction and the freedom to make choices that help accomplish the goal. Overly general comments like "Good job" or "You could have handled that better" aren't helpful. What was great about the way they dealt with the customer? Be sure to reinforce that aspect so they'll do it again. What could they have done better? How? General negative comments lead to paranoia. Quality guru, W. Edward Deming, identifies fear as the basis of all barriers to improving a company.
Stress the benefits It's essential that employees be able to recognize benefits to themselves, for everyone is tuned to that radio station, WII-fm! What's in it for me? What are the benefits to them? Not to the company. Or to the bottom line. But to them, personally. Let's take a very straightforward example. We all know that a smile is the best way to greet a customer, right? So why doesn't that young employee smile? Perhaps she's shy. Perhaps he simply doesn't realize that he neglects to smile. Walk in the other person's shoes before offering criticism. You'll also identify perceived benefits to them during this stroll. Ask the employee, "What happens when you smile at someone?" The answer, "They smile back!" That's the benefit to the employee—dealing all day with a bunch of smiling people! Attitudes and feelings—being liked and treated nicely is going to motivate many employees more than the carrot of increased sales.
Recognize and reward To be perceived as a positive relationship, the ratio of positive to negative input needs to be 4 to 1. We need to reinforce positive characteristics. Rather than saving praise and suggestions for that dreaded performance review, offer them freely and frequently. Compliment employees on their everyday achievements. Come up with ways to acknowledge them. Send a thank you note. Bestow a fun award at a staff meeting.
Act as a role model As employers and managers, we can serve as models of the behavior we would like to see from our employees. It's important to realize that we can't change other people, we can only change ourselves. But, by altering our actions and reactions, we can influence the response we get. By altering their actions and reactions, employees can influence the responses they get from their customers.
Celebrate your strengths Remember to acknowledge employees' strengths. Celebrate what you already do right and then take a look at those things you can do to better manage the impression your company projects. You can create a service image that draws customers and keeps them coming back. For, customer satisfaction is about feelings. Remember the words of Karl Albrecht, "However your employees feel is how your customers are going to feel, sooner or later." A satisfied customer is a loyal customer and in a service business, that's the bottom line.
Small Changes…BIG Payoffs for Women It's not the elephants that get us—it's the mosquitoes. And just as those pesky insects are hard to see, it's difficult for us to identify the little things we do that affect how others perceive us. These small things can sabotage our potential to influence other people and undermine our ability to succeed. How's your handshake? Consider, for instance, your handshake. I am repeatedly amazed when a woman presents her hand as though she expects it to be kissed! Be sure to extend your hand immediately and use this formality to quickly establish rapport and trust. The web of your thumb should meet that of the other person. Wrap your fingers around their hand and squeeze gently. Do not let your wrist bend or break and never claw or pinch your fingers! A brisk shake is all that's needed—no pumping. Accompany this with direct eye contact and you're sending silent messages that say you're confident, competent and credible. It's no wonder that a simple handshake can play such a big role in our bid for success. Research by Dr. Albert Mehrabian shows that if our communication is incongruent—if the way we look and the way we sound don't agree with the words we say—what others see will comprise 55% of the message they receive and what they hear 38%. With the words we choose at a mere 7%, our actions—facial expressions, gestures, posture—truly speak louder than our words. Posture that is perceived as powerful is open, relaxed, expansive and erect without being tense. Women are often at a height disadvantage, so expand the space you use when sitting and standing. Years ago at finishing school, we were taught to pull the heel of one foot into the instep of the other and to place one hand in the palm of the other. This is very demure, but in a powerful stance your feet are shoulder-width apart and your arms extend away from your body. How do you sound? Now, what happens when you open your mouth? A voice that's too high, soft or shrill is hard to listen to and harder to believe. And, many of us need to learn to slow down! Pauses can be used very effectively to capture people's attention. A voice that emanates energy is dynamic. We sound bored when our voice is flat, tense or nasal. Tape yourself. Listen to yourself. I change the message on my voice mail every day. Besides entertaining my clients, this is a perfect opportunity to listen to my voice at different times of day and affected by varying amounts of sleep and caffeine! What did you say? Your conversational style and message are, of course, crucial. They will enhance, support and balance your nonverbal communications. Judith C. Tingley, Ph.D., a fellow member of the National Speakers Association, coined the term Genderflexing. It means "to temporarily use some communication behaviors typical of the other gender in order to increase your potential for influence." Tingley maintains—somewhat tongue in cheek—that women most frequently talk about people, feelings and relationship; while men's conversation is full of business, sports and money. She suggests that we incorporate subjects of interest to the opposite gender to better get our point across. It's not necessary to read the sports page everyday. It is as simple as using an occasional sports metaphor: "Things aren't quite up to par." "Let's get off to a running start." Perhaps it's a simple exclamation: "What about those Yankees?!" Done. I'll never forget hearing Lou Holtz, the famous coach of Notre Dame, speak. As the daughter of a football coach, I was looking forward to his keynote, but I suspect there were some less-than-interested women (and, perhaps, a few men) in the audience. He opened by talking about his lisp and the challenges that had brought him. Then he read a poem written by one of his linemen. His frequent references to his wife and children cinched the deal. The entire audience rose to a standing ovation. Deborah Tannen in her book, You Just Don't Understand, tells us that men view conversation as competition. Rather than listening attentively—which is our natural wont—we need to jump into the game by interrupting with challenges, matching information or an opposing point of view. Otherwise, you'll find yourself sitting through a lecture. Lighten up! Women need to lighten up and employ more humor in conversation. When we are so very serious, we are perceived as fragile, inaccessible or unresponsive. Of course, most of us are more likely to blow a punch line than tell a joke well! Some good books to help you raise your humor quotient are What Mona Lisa Knew by Dr. Barbara Mackoff, They Used to Call Me Snow White…But I Drifted (seriously!) by Regina Barreca and The Light Touch by Malcolm Kushner. And you know, there's an added bonus—laughter is also one of the best ways to reduce stress. Just as mosquitoes can't become elephants, we can't change other people. Have you noticed? We can, however, change ourselves. And, by altering our actions and reactions, we can influence the response we get from others. It's not about who wins and who loses; it's about win-win. This article originally appeared in a Puget Sound Business Journal issue of Women, Inc.
Are You Having an Identity Crisis? Or perhaps it's just time to update your store's image. Life has a way of sidetracking us. Every so often we need to revisit what we're all about. As a store owner, it's easy to get tunnel vision because you're in your store day in and day out and, quite simply, don't get out much! So find a quiet spot (outside your store), pour your favorite thinking beverage and spread all your printed materials out before you—business card, bags, signs, postcards, newsletters, receipts. What image or mood do they evoke? Are they sending the right message? Do they make a unique statement? Do they appeal to your target customer? Who is your target customer? Who is your target customer? Let's start with that last question. According to David Acker, author of Building Strong Brands, a brand is "a set of associations that provides a distinct image and the basis for a loyal relationship." And isn't that what we all want—loyal customers? Picture as many of your regular customers as you can and ask yourself: what's their average age? What are their interests, tastes, special requests, needs? At Opus 204—a specialty home accessories and women's clothing store in Seattle—it's easy to picture their customers. They're featured in the frames they have for sale. Walk into Opus and you feel as though you've walked into the home of a friend. Establish what's unique about your store Next, think about the distinct image your store provides. Strong brands—and stores—create an experience that can't be found anywhere else. What sets you apart from your competition? Try this exercise: jot down words that evoke images of your store—that define its uniqueness. Ask your employees to do the same; then ask some of your loyal customers. Hone that list down to five or six words that describe the unique experience you offer customers. Now take a look at your printed materials again. Are they in line with this image? Once you have some clear criteria, you can take a look at the decisions you make and be sure you're still appealing to—and drawing in—your target customers. Maybe you changed your business card simply because you were bored. Perhaps you hired a new employee who is very clever and created a new promotional piece without truly understanding your customer or your unique image. Time to get back on track! Create a distinct, consistent image Consultant David Kindard describes a brand as, "a promise held in the mind of a consumer of an individualized, personal and consistent experience." Consistency is the key when you're talking about image and branding—and the key to staying on your customer's mind. Seven distinctive design elements go into creating a consistent visual image—color, typography (fonts), graphic elements, style of art, size, grid (layout) and paper. Each of these elements contributes to the overall image. Whether you work with a graphic designer or create promotional pieces on your computer, each element needs to be carefully selected with your image in mind. Once done, maintain consistency and identity by changing no more than two or three of these elements in any given piece. Obviously, business cards, postcards and bags are all different sizes and, likely, different paper; but the other five elements need to remain constant. Fini, a unique accessory store at Inn at the Market in Seattle, uses a subtle warm pink and cream stripe background on their oval business cards. The store name is in a handwritten-type font with scrolls on the first letter. The body text uses a subtle combination of a serif and a sans serif font. Promotional postcards carry this same background stripe, and feature a variety of one-column grid drawings of women that are evocative of 1960 Vogue. All feature a quirky graphic element that looks, alternately like a satellite or a snowflake. Somehow they look brand new and tastefully old at the same time. The centerpiece of the store is a round, tufted, velvet ottoman; standing fixtures feature oval glass shelves; and wall shelves are warmly lit from behind. An oval mirror is at hand for trying on jewelry. You feel as though you've walked into a jewel box or a boudoir. Just the place to find the perfect gloves, necklace or hat. Across the courtyard from Fini is Watson Kennedy. They offer French gift items with a large selection of soaps and linens. Their graphics are all black and white and feature a logo of two French doors with striped awning and topiary trees. A simple stamp of a green fern frond easily and inexpensively adds a touch of color to the black and white receipt and evokes the fresh feeling of their wonderful wares. Write promotional pieces that grab their attention Some of you may struggle with the same problem I do—a pompous, verbose, wordy writing style! Yet it's catchy, shorter copy that captures customers' attention. One of my favorite postcards from Opus 204 features a line drawing of a palm tree and a stretch of sand. Written where a vacationer would be stretched out under that tree are the words, "Going somewhere?" Turn over the card and it says, "Dress for it! …in wearable, packable styles and fabrics from Opus 204." Of course, it arrived just when their customers were booking their winter escapes. Make your customers feel special Remember, Consultant Kindard described a brand as an individualized and personal experience. Promotions don't have to be big events. The useable, thoughtful ones are appealing to your target customers. Look around you and you'll find inspiration everywhere. When I sort the mail, anything that catches my eye goes into my idea basket. And I'm a pack rat when I'm out and about. When it's time to create something, I sort through this basket for inspiration. Sell candles? Have boxes of wooden matches imprinted with your store name and logo. Sell containers and pots? Create small bags of seeds that you staple to your card or stick your label on a packet of seeds. Who wouldn't like a small sachet for their drawer? All you need is potpourri, a small square of fabric and ribbon imprinted with your logo. There you are—on a shelf, on a table, in a drawer—on your customer's mind. A constant reminder to stop in and see what's new. And the easiest way to make a customer feel special is to say, "I thought of you today." All it takes is a handwritten note with an interesting stamp in your store colors. There is nothing more powerful in today's hectic world of email, fax and cell phones. Of course, this means you need notecards with your logo or a picture of your store and an excellent system for keeping track of your regular customers' likes, needs and interests. When I worked at Nordstrom, my personal book was a record of relationships built and a goldmine for future business. Holiday after holiday, just the perfect gift went home to a lucky, loyal customer. A brand is a
promise Futurist Watts Wacker says, "A brand is a promise, and in the end, you have to keep your promises." Promise yourself you'll find a quiet time to pour over your printed materials to make sure they evoke the right image for your store. Join me in August at The Seattle Gift Show and the San Francisco International Gift Fair for the seminar Having an Identity Crisis? and you'll leave with lots of fresh ideas to implement. This article was featured in Western Show News prior to Jan speaking at The Seattle Gift Show and The San Francisco International Gift Fair in August, 2003.
Show Respect for Clients—Dress Up, Not Down! From the shine on your shoes to the crease in your slacks, your attention to detail—or lack of it—says a great deal about you. The quality of attention you pay to your personal presentation implies the caliber of attention you pay to the work you do for your clients. The results of a national survey released in September show that more than 70 percent of executives surveyed agreed that workplace attire affects an employee's state of mind and/or behavior and, therefore, his or her productivity. The survey, commissioned by No nonsense®, was posed to 150 senior executives and CEOs among the nation's top 500 manufacturing and service firms. Think about it. What message are you sending to clients when you appear in a wrinkled shirt and athletic shoes or have a hem drooping and a spot on your jacket? Do you look like someone who pays attention to details? Would they assume you are organized? No! Project an image of professionalism and trust
Advance faster in your career
Feedback from supervisors is important
Favorable response to more professional attire
This article appeared in the newsletter of a CPA firm. This client directs their newsletter to clients and firm principals, associates, managers and staff.
Whether you're making a business presentation or speaking before a luncheon audience, your appearance can work for you or against you. It can enhance your message or detract from it. When you appear confident, you win over an audience before you say a word. Focus attention on your face Use value placement in your clothing to focus your audience's attention on your face—and what you are saying. Value is the lightness or darkness of a color. It's best if the garment dominant on your upper torso—your jacket—is similar in value to your hair. You want to avoid the illusion of your head and body separating. If a dark-haired person wears all light colors, it's as disconcerting as looking at a bowling ball precariously balanced on a white column. You're just waiting for it to fall off! You can intensify the focus of your audience's attention by wearing colors that enhance your own coloring. In the wrong colors you will look older, tired and sick. The wrong colors can make a man look as though he has a five o'clock shadow or drain the color and vitality from your face. Your personal power colors are those in your natural coloring—your hair and eyes—and the complements of those colors. That's why green-eyed people look so good in red and why blondes look terrific in purple. Wear your personal power colors close to your face—a tie, your blouse or a scarf—for optimum effectiveness. If you wear colors that are too intense—or bright—for your own coloring, the audience will look at the color before they look at you. Use the squint test Use the squint test to judge your success with value placement and color intensity. Stand before a full-length mirror and squint at yourself. By doing this you eliminate the actual color of garments and can judge the overall effect. Any dramatic change in value or intensity should occur very near the face. Where does your eye go? Men have the perfect uniform for focusing attention on their face—the suit. The suit is the frame, the shirt is the mat, and the tie is the painting—an arrow pointing directly at your face. Be sure that arrow is one of your personal power colors. To maximize this effect, start your speech with the top button of your jacket buttoned. You can use the gesture of unbuttoning or taking off a jacket to send a nonverbal message that will establish even greater rapport between you and your audience. Check your outfit from all angles. Scrutinize a videotape of yourself or have someone watch you as you make typical gestures and movements. When you raise your arm does the shoulder pad make you look like Quasimodo? Does the vent in the back of your jacket stretch open alarmingly? Just how short does your skirt become when you sit down or bend over to pick up a prop? When standing before an audience, hosiery and shoes take on particular significance. For both men and women, socks or stockings should create a blend between hem and shoe by being similar in value to both. Yet another reason not to wear white socks with a navy suit! It's a good idea to have an extra tie or pair of pantyhose with you in the event of an accident. Who needs the unnecessary annoyance caused by a run in your nylons or a spill on your tie—or wants their audience's attention diverted by that run or spot? Don't distract your audience Consider if anything you wear might be distracting to your audience. Accessories should not draw attention to themselves. Loud jewelry can drive your audience crazy. Extremely long or brightly-colored fingernails simply look inappropriate—suggesting that you are a dilettante with too much leisure time on your hands. It should go without saying—but hey, it's my job—you must pay special attention to your grooming. Your audience will. A neat and flattering haircut is essential—the audience wants to be able to see your face. Men who wear beards should be sure that they are well-trimmed. Avoid hair that flops in your face or the annoying mannerism of pushing at your hair. Another annoying pretense is to peer at the audience over the top of glasses. Learn to take off your glasses and gesture with them when you're not reading. Or get bifocals instead of wearing half-glasses. Your goal as a speaker or presenter is to dress appropriately for your audience in a way that enhances your message and focuses their attention on you. The more confident you feel, the better speech or presentation you will give. The more appropriate, comfortable and confident you look, the better you will be received.
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© Jan M. McLaughlin 2007, 300A 26th Avenue East, Seattle,
Washington 98112
Phone: 206.328.0080 Fax: 206.323.5954 Jan@YourCommunicationConnection.com